Memorial Day Thoughts

Here on Memorial Day weekend I think about all the divorces/separations that occur with military partners and the trouble they suffer too.

I have been on many military websites and have offered my help and have hoped that I have helped some to do better.

I am emailing government agencies, this weekend, that may be key stakeholders and decisionmakers in how I may help many others in an efficient and effective manner.

I want to close by saying THANKS to all of those for serving our country and all of us. Thank You!

Brian Daniel

More GOOD Feedback!

I received some good feedback on my book from Divorce Professionals, mediators, financial analysts and other coaches for those in divorce and separation.

They all agree that support for these persons, that need to get going again in their "new" life, is part of all the good help they need to move on.

This was my intent in writing my book and I'm glad that it is helpful to others.

See Amazon's Books and search for "upside of divorce".

Brian Daniel

Many Have Written About the "Upside(s) of Divorce"

I googled "upside of divorce" and found articles by Huffington Post and Women on the Fence, to name two sources from today's search, who actually used these words in their titles!

My blog here was in the #3 spot in the first google page and I feel good about that.

My blogs about my book were in positions #4 and #5 too.

So it seems to me that the notion that there are indeed UPSIDES of divorce (and separation too) is shared not only by me but by others too!

I have run across two or more comments by those that are sure there are no upsides, but these persons always seem to be in the early stages of the separating process and are very negative (as most of us understand!, huh?)

I am glad to know this re-inforcement of the POSITIVE replies is shared by many more believers than disbelievers!

I hope that I can continue helping others for a long time.

Brian

Good Reviews from LinkedIn Divorce Professionals

Here's some good reviews from LinkedIn Divorce Professionals, Brian.

Marketing for Divorce Professionals
Join LinkedIn for free to participate in the conversation.

A NEW Positive Divorce Recovery Book for Your Clients My book is about my experiences with divorce and how I was able to see the upsides in my second chance at life, and how I made a GREAT recovery.
Get my book on divorce recovery is called "Yes, There Is an Upside of Divorce, It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!" You can search "upside of divorce" on Amazon and read the great reviews I have there.
Book Discounts are available on my own website, Self-Help-Products-and-Services (com) where you can save $4 to $7 off Amazon’s costs per book. Brian Daniel

Nina W. likes this

• Sounds similar to my philosophy in my Divorce Recovery sessions for www.thenewdirectionscenter.com. I use a faith based approach.


Boyd L. • Brian: Check out my new blog on Divorce Recovery Resources. As soon as I get some more traffic, I'm going to recommend your book.


Donna C. • I have read Brian's book and he does a very good job at getting readers to stop focusing on the negatives and take a positive approach to divorce. Last summer I wrote a review of his book on my Examiner page. If anyone would like to view it go to the following link: http://www.examiner.com/divorce-financial-planning-in-pittsburgh/is-there-an-upside-to-divorce


Kathy W. • Brian: I'm glad you wrote a book on divorce and your ability to have a great recovery from it. Not many men write on this topic. Congrats and I hope you can reach a lot of hurting people going through divorce.

I'd like to share one tidbit with you if I may. I just went through my second divorce in 2006. As a devout Christian I wanted to be sure I wasn't going against God's will in the Bible. I picked up a book "Divorce: God's Will?" by Stephen Gola and it totally turned my perspective around. The one Scripture that says "A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried.." The church has used this text to tell women that if they are the one initiating divorce, then they have to remain unmarried the rest of their life. Actually, the Greek word for "depart" is separation (not divorce). So the Scripture was saying, if the wife is separated, she should not remarry during that time of separation (she should be divorced before she remarries). This was so freeing to me - and to thousands of other women who have heard this Scripture in the church. I hope you'll share about this guy's book when you come across hurting Christian women who might also be misled in this area. The guy's website is www.DivorceHope.com

Brian D. • Thanks all for the kind words and warm welcomes! I am glad I joined here!
Special thanks to Donna C above!

Any Interest in Me as a Post-Divorce/Separation LIFE COACH?

I have discussed with many buyers of my book, personal problems we shared in our divorce/separation experiences.

We discussed personal problems about anger, loneliness, loss of self-esteem and so forth. And more negative issues about how to get a long with the ex, the effects on family and friends, loss of productivity at work, and at home--though for these negative issues, I quickly offer POSITIVE ways to improve!

I have received great feedback and hints that I should consider coaching others. So here I am!

I don't expect any quick "customers" but anyone interested can start by looking at my book reviews at Amazon. Search "upside of divorce" there.

Brian Daniel

"What Really Helps" Divorced and Separated Partners

E. Goldstein'­s article on the Huffington Post today about "What Really Helps" is a great one. It talks about the compassion you need to show others when listening to them and trying to help them.

My good reviews by readers of my book sense the compassion I have for wanting to help them. I tell about my "dark days" in divorce, how to deal with all the negatives and compassionately try to move them to see the UPSIDES that are there too for them.

For divorced or separated people, what really helps them are friends and fa­mily that know divorce/se­paration -- knowing what they are feeling and how to get them felling better is most imortant.

My book about my divorce can take them through what the next two years of moving on past divorce is all about and how to do it successful­ly.


If you need help or are interested­ in helping others in divorce or separation, see more of my book info at "upside of divorce" at Amazon or at my own website, Self-Help-­Products-a­nd-Service­s.

Brian Daniel

Children Affected by Divorce

I have read many blogs and articles about children and how they may be negatively affected by a divorce.

There are many support groups for adults in divorce and almost as many nowadays for children as well.

In my own experience, my boys were 16 and 19 years of age and seemed to be OK with their Mom and Dad's troubles and didn't appear to take any one side of it either. There wasn't a lot of yelling between us at all and perhaps that made it a bit easier on them too.

I wrote in my book about how very important it is to not put your children (as well as friends and family too) in the middle of your divorce or separation and this alone will help ease their concerns or responsibilities too.

As a positive note here, I believe that our divorce actually made our boys mature a little faster than they might otherwise have done.
And that was a GOOD thing and maybe even an upside too!

Brian Daniel

My Book Can Take You from Despair with Divorce to a GREAT New Life!

A reader commented yesterday about how extensive my book help was.
She commented about how much information on so many topics about divorce recovery was jammed into my text.

She was happy about the "quick relief" offered about how to move on past the downsides of divorce and then quickly get aimed at the many more UPSIDES of that same terrible change in her life.

And how even after finding the many good ways to get past her divorce (a GREAT feat in itself!), there was plenty of chapters and many more ways to find an EVEN BETTER life yet!!

She was very pleased to say that this book value was the best she had ever found.

Thank you, F.R.

Brian Daniel

Please Buy My Book on My Website! especially if you live outside the USA!

I have watched three book sales off of my Amazon Book page this past week alone, and although I am glad for that, I am missing any feedback that these customers may have to offer.

These book sales could be going to Canada, England, New Zealand, Australia, India and other foreign countries since I email to them many times per day, and for sure, many times every week. Amazon sends book to them but limits my royalties to just USA sales.

One fellow from Australia asked me if I would indeed send it to him in the mail and of course I said yes! But I don't think he believed me.
I have mailed some books to England for possible sales and the postage is NOT a lot higher.

Book Customers can save $3 to $5 per book off Amazon's costs by going through my website, Self-Help-Products-and-Services.com
And please, do send back some feedback -- My address for email is at the back of the book on page 212.

Thanks!
Brian Daniel

Optimist or Pessimist? Positive or Negative Attitude? Success or Failure?

This is not a blog about right or wrong, or good or bad, or divorced or not, or separated or not. For the latter, some would say conversely, divorced or separated, or wrongly still together?

This about how you see things, changes in life, sickness or accidents, life's disappointments, or other stressful occasions? And, how you react to them.....

Internet discussions today were pretty negative. Pessimists were looking for help. Others were wondering how to become more positive. Some were searching or wishing/wanting to have success, not failures.

The negative items are hard to beat. They can linger long. The negative styles attract more negatives too! Failures seem to continue, over and over. Depression can be lingering near.

The positives are easier to deal with and can multiply quickly too. They can heap on each other, causing synergies and be contagious. Successes appear everywhere. Self actualization begins.

You can choose which one you want. No one can make you one or the other.
Which do you want to be?

My book title says it all, all upsides (with help for the negative sides too).
Brian Daniel

Millions of People Every Year in Our Country Divorce and Separate

One of the most difficult downsides of divorce or separation is the alienation, loneliness, shame and feelings of failure about your break-up with a partner. Anger, resentment and hostility can also cloud your days with more negative thoughts. These can be very terrible and can easily weigh one down with depression.

One can feel so alone in this traumatic change in life.

BUT THE POINT HERE IS THAT THERE ARE MILLIONS OF OTHERS GOING THROUGH THESE SAME FEELINGS. YOU CAN FIND THESE OTHERS ON INTERNET SUPPORT GROUPS, IN LOCAL CHURCH PROGRAMS AND OTHERS AT WORK OR FRIENDS OF FRIENDS TOO.

It is important for you to see you are not alone in this, and that you may not be such a terrible partner. Every breakup has two sides of its story and quite frankly, both sides are both at fault in most cases.

I had the same feelings too. But after I realized the millions of others who have these same problems, IT HELPED ME TO COME TO GRIPS WITH MY OWN SITUATION AND RATIONALIZE WHAT I HAD LEARNED. You can do this too.

Later on, we all will see then, HOW IT IS UP TO EACH OF US TO MOVE PAST THIS AND HOW WE CHOOSE TO START A NEW LIFE. THIS IS WHERE YOU LEAVE THE OTHERS AND YOUR PAST BEHIND AND MOVE FORWARD.

My book can help you make all of these transitions easier and more quickly.
I can help you through the downsides and then how to find your UPSIDES too.

You can do this just as soon as you decide to.

Brian Daniel

What Do You Want To Do With Your Second Chance At Life?

The UPSIDE of your separation or divorce will be that you CAN HAVE a second chance at life.

It is up to you to decide what, when and how you want to take that second chance at your rest-of-life.
Youe second chance may involve also "who" you want to be with too.

No need to hurry these decisions though. I was able quickly to get busy with some new hobbies, better health, better fitness and new friends and these took about two years. I then began to date again and work on new relationships with possible long term partners.

After about eight years after my divorce, I am still doing ALL of these above and some new ones!
I truly do have a happier and more enjoyable life and all of these things are part of that better life.

What would you like to do with your second chance at life?

Brian Daniel

ANOTHER 5-Star Book Review of "Yes, There Is an Upside of Divorce"

I just got this review (below) from another person who went through a divorce and found some good help in my book. I copied it directly from my Amazon Book Page. It is dated February 17, 2011, just yesterday!

Thanks for getting my book and I am glad it helped you!
Brian Daniel

Here's the review.....

By C. Casteel -

This review is from: Yes, There Is an Upside of Divorce, It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!: And You Can Make It a Happier and More Enjoyable Life Too! (Paperback)

The advice in this book has been indispensable in helping me move on during and after my divorce.

The author validates what I have been thinking and feeling. He gave me permission to do the things I thought were the right things to do.

I truly believe that there is a life after divorce and that it is up to us to decide what kind of life that will be.

This book tells one how to move on with ones life and to let go of the past. Great book and I highly recommend it.

My Book and Other Good Help is at Self-Help-Products-and-Services.com

You can save at least $3 to $5 off Amazon's book prices, with buying my book off my own website. I can ship your book to you within 1 or 2 business days after your PayPal receipt is received.

The other good help I offer is my Ten Best Money Ideas which have a money back guarantee, and a way to resolve a bad investment which is not suitable for you.

All of these are on my website, Self-Help-Products-and-Services.com
James@self-help-products-and-services.com can handle all orders and questions you may have.

Both my book and my money saving information can help you!
I have received only good feedback so far and no negative comments at all!

Brian Daniel

In Divorce and Separation, There Is Lonely and Alone, And a Difference!

Everyone in divorce or separation will be lonely, at some point and for some time. Some spend a lot of time being lonely.

But being alone is different. IT CAN HAVE AN UPSIDE!

When alone, you can get busy and do things for yourself, for your children, for your friends and for your community. You can clean up where you live, do some exercise, yardwork, get rid of clutter, start a new hobby and so forth.

These GOOD things-to-do will help you see that you have spent your time alone very well and your confidence and self esteem will GROW.

Being lonely is difficult and can make you negative, but being alone has its UPSIDES and can make you more POSITIVE!

There's quite a difference here, yes?

Brian Daniel