How Long Does It Take to Move On Past Divorce?

PEOPLE HAVE ASKED ME.....
How long did it take you to find the positive side of your divorce?

My book discusses this at length, but the short answer is "about two years" for most everyone. Many books I have read say the same thing.

PERSONALLY, It took me only a few weeks. I was a lucky one.
After two weeks of pleading by me to try counseling, I gave up on that and started thinking just about me and my two boys. My oldest was going to college and already on his own. The youngest son was going to be a sophomore in high school and was very close to his Mom. We were lucky about our boys' ages.

That left me to decide only what I want to do for ME mostly.

While finishing our dissolution terms with a lawyer about the same couple of weeks later, he remarked, "Wow! you've got to be the most positive guy I've seen this early in a divorce!" I liked that! I knew then I was on my way to a better life for me!
My positive thinking helped a lot!


SOME OTHER FOLKS CAN SPEND VERY LONG TIMES TRYING TO GET STARTED AND MOVE ON PAST THEIR DIVORCE OR SEPARATION. It is mostly up to each of us.

HERE ARE A COUPLE ANSWERS FROM TWO OTHERS...
1) I am not there yet. I wanted my husband to go to counseling and while we went he was dating other women. After realizing he was not going to put his energy back into our relationship and our family, I decided to file for divorce.
I have joined a single mother's ministry at church, reconnected with old friends and continue to make new ones. The loss and hurt are still very present & painful.
Everyday I remind myself to do the right thing for me and our child - it just still hurts.

2)I was lucky, it took me no time at all to be noticed by a lovely lady who charmed me into forgetting about my troubles and gave me something to look forward to!


THERE ARE MANY OTHER STORIES, BUT AGAIN THE MOST REPORTED AVERAGE TIME IS TWO YEARS.
It takes that much time to get into your new living arrangements, a new or part time job, new routines, new friends and perhaps a lot of time to think through what you want to do now and how to get started.
THERE ARE NO RIGHT ANSWERS FOR YOUR SITUATION. BE COMFORTABLE AND TAKE YOUR TIME.
I HAVE FOUND THAT FASTER IS MOSTLY BETTER, ESPECIALLY IF YOU GET BUSY TRYING NEW THINGS. If busy enough, you will wake up some day after a great day you just had and realize you have already moved on!!

Brian Daniel

Help & Recovery Tips for Divorce/Separated Folks

It's been six years since my divorce after 24 years of marriage. My two boys are on their own now and so am I.

I wrote a book about divorce recovery because I think it can help the millions of other people who suffer through divorce each year in our country. With some prayers and some positive thinking, you can see the real upside is that You Can Have a Second Chance at Life! My book tells of my own experiences and how I was able to see the many more positive sides of divorce that are there too to enjoy in your new life AFTER divorce. And it is possible to make it a Happier and More Enjoyable life too!

If you want to get my book, search WWW. Self-Help-Products-and-Services.com (discounts available here!).....or search "upside of divorce" in Books section of amazon.com.

My book is listed on amazon.com. It has received a recommendation from Self-Help-Product-Reviews and a full 5-star rating from my first reviewer at amazon.com.


OTHER FOLKS HAVE RESPONDED BACK TO ME ABOUT THEIR "UPSIDES" TOO!
HERE'S ONE OF THEM....
I have to agree with you. There is life after divorce. I am free to make my own choices about every facet of my life. Sure going through the divorce was probably the hardest thing I have ever done.
During the divorce I lived on a very limited income. But it didn't stop me from going to college and getting a degree in Social Work and I have gone back to college three more times to get certificates in Office Technology, Medical Transcription and Medical Billing.
I live alone in a trailer that I bought and own. First home I have ever owned. I am slowly remodeling it. Never knew I had an talent in this sort of thing. I have found that I like being independent. I have had to learn plumbing, and electricity, and I am proud of the things I can do now and the things I have accomplished.
I have met many new people. I go dancing once a month. I am enjoying my life and my freedom. I should have done this 18 years ago.
So to all of you out there...if you aren't happy leave. There is life after divorce. It takes a bit of adjusting to......but your biggest fear is the fear of the unknown. You have one life to live...you might as well make it a happy one!

THERE ARE MANY OTHERS WHO HAVE SUCCESS STORIES TOO!
It is good to hear from someone else who can become positive even, with such a traumatic change in life.
Divorce will force some changes on us. They can all be bad ones, or we can turn them into good ones!
It is mostly up to each of us, ourselves, how we decide to go on and live the rest of lives. We can choose to make this second chance at life, our chance to make it a happier and more enjoyable one than the one we had before!

You too can find UPSIDES to your divorce or separation. You can do it as soon as you decide to.....

Brian Daniel

Seeing the UPSIDES of Divorce and Separation

I wrote my Self-Help book about the Upside of Divorce, the basic one being "It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!" There can be many more specific upsides having to do with learning from your mistakes, self-improvements, new hobbies, community service, doing the Ten Things You Always Wanted to Do before you get too old, and so forth. But most people are "blind" to these positive sides of divorce
and have to be able to "see" the positives they still have first and then to build upon those with others I mention above. Some people have to get over the belief that "there are no positives sides of divorce and separation" since all they ever hear about are the negative sides.
If you're interested in my book, take a look at the link below.

http://www.amazon.com/There-Upside-Divorce-Second-Chance/dp/1419693042/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8

Brian Daniel

A Happier and More Enjoyable Life BEYOND Divorce!

Once we all can see and get past the negative sides of divorce or separation, we can then eagerly see and enjoy the many more UPSIDES of divorce. I've spent most of the time in my previous discussions about this. More details of these things are in the first few chapters of my book, "Yes, There Is an Upside of Divorce -- It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!

But there is an even higher level you can reach in your life and that is to really feel true happiness in your every day of life. This needs a very positive outlook on life and some understanding of Zen philosophy and other methods that you can use to "learn" how to do this.

Most of these things are really simple, common sense type of things.
I spend a few of my book's chapters, later on in my book, describing these things and ways to practice and use these in your life.

You can link to my Amazon book page directly with the link below...

http://www.amazon.com/There-Upside-Divorce-Second-Chance/dp/1419693...

Take a look if you are interested!

Brian Daniel

A Simple Way to Feel Some Happiness and Give It to Others Too!

Reply by michelle vs on November 5, 2008 at 3:18pm
Thank you Jim for the uplifting thoughts.After reading some of the forum answers I needed to read something uplifting and positive.

▶ Reply to This

Brian Daniel Permalink Reply by Brian Daniel on November 5, 2008 at 3:51pm
Delete
thanks to you too! I had noted previously how just smiling and saying hello to others that I used to just pass by on the way into and out of stores helped them to smile and made me a little happier each time I did it!
I received quite a few compliments on this and was glad to hear them as I did include it in a book I wrote about the ....Upside of Divorce and was glad to see it works for others!
Would you agree with this too?

michelle vs said:

Thank you Jim for the uplifting thoughts.After reading some of the forum answers I needed to read something uplifting and positive.

▶ Reply to This

michelle vs Permalink Reply by michelle vs on November 5, 2008 at 3:54pm
Oh I definately agree.90%of the people I smile at return it.The other 10% just think I'm up to something.
Jim said:

thanks to you too! I had noted previously how just smiling and saying hello to others that I used to just pass by on the way into and out of stores helped them to smile and made me a little happier each time I did it!
I received quite a few compliments on this and was glad to hear them as I did include it in a book I wrote about the ....Upside of Divorce and was glad to see it works for others!
Would you agree with this too?

michelle vs said:

Thank you Jim for the uplifting thoughts.After reading some of the forum answers I needed to read something uplifting and positive.

Yes, There IS an Upside of Divorce, It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!

Divorce Got You Down? Try "Yes There Is an Upside of Divorce, It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!" by Brian Daniel

Hi Everyone,

This book is based on my own personal experiences with divorce and some six years after divorce. I believe it can help the millions of others who suffer through a divorce and separation each year in our country. With some prayers and positive thinking, I can show them how to handle the most difficult issues of divorce more easily and quickly than I did myself. I can then move them on to a real second chance at life. They will see the many upsides and opportunities that are there for them too after divorce. The many new “things-to-do” that I did to make it a happier and more enjoyable life for myself may also help them to do the same.

Are there really UPSIDES to your divorce? Well, this is mostly up to you. I can tell you and show you how I was able to see the upsides in my divorce just a few weeks after separating. I can further explain how I was able to find opportunities in all my lonely hours and turn this traumatic life change into a second chance to live a better, happier and more enjoyable life. But again, your upsides will be mostly up to you. If you can use positive thinking and are willing to try some new things-to-do that will keep you busy and improve yourself, then you will be able to see and enjoy your own upsides of divorce too!

My book is also listed on amazon.com. It has received a recommendation from Self-Help-Product-Reviews and a full 5-star rating from my first reviewer at amazon.com. You can easily find it by searching “upside of divorce” in their Books section. Clicking on the cover will take you to my book’s separate page where you can look inside to see the table of contents and an excerpt.

I have used a pen name “Brian Daniel” in tribute to my two sons who have helped with this book. My book is also available from Baker & Taylor and Book Surge, the publisher, if you’d ever like to recommend it to other churches, support groups and retail stores.

Jim

Divorce Recovery Can Be Much Better Than You Think!

Divorce Recovery Can Be Much Faster and Better Than You Think!

In divorce, you may be shocked and feeling lost, angry, and alone. You may be wondering how you will get through this and how life may now even be over for you.

Would you believe that your life after divorce might actually be a better one?

My book, “Yes, There Is an Upside of Divorce – It Can Be Your Second Chance at Life!” is based on my own personal experiences with divorce; both the negative issues and the many more POSITIVE sides that can exist AFTER divorce too. I believe it can help many of the millions of us who suffer through a divorce and separation each year in our country.

With some prayers and positive thinking, I can show you how to handle the most difficult issues of divorce more easily and quickly than I did myself. I can then help you to move on to your real second chance at life, where you will see the many more positive sides and opportunities that are there for you after divorce. The many new “things-to-do,” that I did to make it a happier and more enjoyable rest-of-life for myself, may also help you to do the same.


My book is listed on amazon.com and you can link to my Amazon book page by searching “upside of divorce” in their Books section.)

Clicking on the cover will take you to my book’s separate page where you can look inside to see the table of contents and an excerpt.

My book has received a recommendation from Self-Help-Product-Reviews and a full 5-star rating from my first reviewer there.

Use another separate website if you want to save some $$$ on more copies.
See Self-Help-Products-and-Services.com

Buy your book copies on “Books” page, by pushing “Books” tab or button on the left side of each page of this website.

For orders of 2, 4 and 6 copies or more, we can offer a 20%, 30% and 41% discount respectively, including reduced shipping cost per book too.

Use Pay Pal to enter your desired copies of the book. Then enter your US zip code for your discounted S&H charge and pay your total cost.

Email your orders to James@Self-Help-Products-and-Services.com and please identify your names/email and postal addresses with your order. He will prepare and ship your order to your address within 2 days of your receipt of funds through Pay Pal.

Thanks for your consideration here.
Brian Daniel